yoctogram | Video - Locked FROM Belphe

Video - Locked FROM Belphe

[Sho is actually doing a video on purpose. Of course, this is the first time he's done it that was both on purpose and not locked to a single person. Milestone!]

So. [He looks uncharacteristically apologetic.] I have to ask. Has anyone seen a runt of a grey Eevee? Probably out there looking like he's been hit with a graduate level maths examination. [And under his breath] Hopefully not dead. She'll kill me if he's dead.

[Back to a normal level of speaking] He answers to the name Taboo...I did not name him, okay? [Obviously, Sho, it's not a maths term!] He's been missing, uh. A couple of months, now. It happened while I wasn't really in a great space. [Read: unmedicated, then on the medication merry go 'round.]

...I don't have a lot on hand, but I will scrape up a reward for his safe return.

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Who cares? Just get a new one.

[Not helping. Also conveniently forgetting his own experiences with being told GET A NEW ONE.]

If it's been gone that long, it probably doesn't want to come back. You said it was too small, anyway. Not like Eevees are that cool...

[The response that Snoutlout got was a gesture that exemplified exactly how much Sho thought of the boy's suggestion, heritage, and brainpower. Really, it was quite eloquent in it's way, and accompanied by a snarling collection of verbal vulgarities all the more impressive for the fact that maths only showed up a couple of times while Sho offered a hypothetical recitation of said heritage.]

[Look, he's a little stressed and Snoutlout's an easy target right now. In that he's there.]

[...And, actually, that did help a little bit. At least he got some stress out?]

[While normally he would try to keep up and toss in some insults of his own, Snotlout pretty much just...watches. And waits. His eyebrows steadily make their way higher and higher until he accidentally looks impressed.

Really, there's just that mechanical bird forever dipping down to drink water going on in his head.

When it seems that Sho is done, however, he manages to shake himself back to the matters at hand and contort his face into something resembling "offended". He's had practice.]

Oh yeah? More like you, for...that thing you said!

[Smooth.]

[Smooth like gravel, Snouty, smooth like gravel.]

You don't even know what I said. [The ex-Reaper snarled, those teensy fangs of his looking like they could do a lot of damage if Snoutlout wasn't safely on the other side of a screen from him. Just because he was medicated did not mean he wasn't still easily driven to homicide. Killing people could be excellent for relaxation!]

Taboo is Bell's Eevee. She loves him. I will get him back, or I'll figure out what it takes to kill people here permanently while trying.

[He doesn't bother asserting that Eevees are spectacular. It doesn't bug the twins, either, seeing as they know they're daddy's favourites.]

Whatever. Doesn't mean it doesn't fit you.

[Even if it probably doesn't, whoops.

Snotlout is giving him the weirdest look.]

One, I'm pretty sure you're crazy. Two, killing someone is kind of a permanent thing? Four, you're not listening. What if Taboo-or-whatever doesn't like you guys?

[And no one was surprised that Snotlout is bad at counting.]

[Sho just snorted at him, then raised an eyebrow]

Of course I'm crazy. As insults go, that's zetta lame.

Killing people here seems to give them a one to two week vacation from life and then they just come back which, while potentially entertaining as hell, means death isn't a very good threat. Torture might still be effective, though. [Coherence has been achieved. Therapy is still working on morality.]

The next point would be three, yoctogram. You count as well as you think, obviously. If Taboo doesn't like being here he can leave again...but I am not losing him and not finding him again.

[Alright, so we've got a Dagur situation on our hands. Only...different because this guy used weird words instead of just threatening to tear your skull free of your spine or something like that? Either way, something's apparently clicked at least slightly in Snotlout's mind. He can do less BLATANT STARING now.]

Uh...huh. A-nyway, if I were that thing, I'd go as far as possible from where you were. Where is it supposed to be around, anyway?

Dunno.

[And didn't that hurt to admit? Yes. Yes it did.]

Not sure which way the Pidgy that grabbed the hang-glider went after they got out of sight. They were headed South from Goldenrod last I saw them.

[The amount that he does not want to go out hunting the little thing personally is only overshadowed by the amount that he does not want Belphe to kill him. Even if he'd come back later, he doesn't want to die. Again.]

[Oh good, he had no obligation to be a hero.]

That place needs a train to get to and I'm not by one. [His MASSIVE SHRUG causes the camera to jostle.] Why not send the other things after it? If one of my dumb foxes can find an invisible lizard, then yours should be able to find another fox. Right?

They're Eevees, not foxes. [Sho said with a sigh] I haven't sent them out alone because I don't send my ... friends out with no way of contacting me.

[Yeah. His team were his friends. He could admit that.]

They look like foxes.

[So ha.]

Alright, pretending that's not totally lame... [My name is Snotlout and I'm a Big Strong Man who don't need no Feelings.] What, you worried they're too weak or something? I don't blame you. The four I've got so far? They ain't right. Ooh, or maybe you think they'll run off, too! Ha! Wouldn't that be somethin'.

Just means you aren't training them well. [Sho said, bored] The twins are level 100, each. [Not going into the separation anxiety that causes the two fully levelled Eevees to scream bloody murder if they think either Sho or Belphe is going to be gone for 'a long time'.]

[Ughhh, any enthusiasm Snotlout had has now left the building.]

I can't train them at all yet. Still waiting for these last two eggs to hatch -- and don't blame me for this taking so long! Stupid breeding place would only give me two at a time.

[But since Sho was against his idea and there seemed like another solution...]

Why aren't you out looking for Thingoo? Like right now.

I had some medical problems.

[He spent a couple of months on the medication merry-go-round and has been crawling back to stable.]

I'll be going out looking for him in a couple of days if this doesn't pan out.

[While that would earn the understanding of most people, Snotlout just scoffs.]

What, so you've been resting? [He actually manages a chuckle and looks...weirdly proud.] Rest is for the weak!

[The way he says it makes it pretty clear that he's parroting someone else's ideals. Snotlout may have realized the mantra was stupid in regards to dragons, but it hadn't really dawned on him yet that maybe his dad didn't know that much about people, either.]

Actually they were finding a set of medications to make it less likely that I rip people's spines out of their body for use in painting fractals. Again.

[Perhaps made all the more surreal by the incredibly matter of fact tone.]

Which isn't the best way to deal with things, but in those moods I'm not really thinking well enough to make paintbrushes, and most human hair isn't particularly well suited for them anyway.

You are so Dagur.

[Apparently he's so fascinated by this revelation that he doesn't mind letting his thoughts slip. Or...the disgusting imagery. Which may only serve as more proof that Snotlout isn't the brightest bulb.]

Come on, do a crazy laugh. Go all the way.

What's a Dagur?

[His head tilts and he leans his chin on his black hand.]

I don't laugh on command. Unless you want to make it stakes in another Game.

He's not a what, he's a who. [And then he looks a little thoughtful because he supposes Dagur could be a what. He was the Berserker chief. He was deranged. There! Already got two. Man, he was so good at th --

OH, RIGHT.] He talks about killing a lot. We think he probably killed his own dad.

[Which, you know. Snotlout hadn't been a big fan of Oswald the Agreeable, but even he could see that Dagur wasn't right for the job.]

A game...? What the heck are you talking about?

[Sho's grin stretched to truly manic proportions.]

A game. A contest. A bet. I spend a lot of time bored, perils of being as smart as I am. So the best way to deal with that, is to create contests. Games.

[Then he leaned back, spreading his hands]

And, hey. In this world, I can't Erase your soul if you lose. I came up with the terms for the Eevee Game, if you want me to laugh for you, it's your turn to design a Game.

[Ooh, a dilemma. On one hand, a chance to win and shut this guy up! (Or...not, as the case may be.) On the other... Dude, no one cares that much about you laughing.

...Though really, he supposed there wasn't really anything to lose, then. TIME TO THINK OF ALL THE THINGS HE'S GOOD AT. There's just so many...]

You ever lug sheep before?

I've never even seen a sheep in person.

[Awwwww fuck. This is going to involve nature. He just knows it. Stupid fucking nature.]

I'm from a city.

[Eh, it's not like it's a high-stakes Game, though.]

[Even if that information doesn't surprise him, given Sho's...Sho-ness, there's still that moment where Snotlout eyes him up like he's a lesser being on the evolutionary scale. He doesn't really like cities much.]

Who's never seen a sheep? Anyway, it's not hard to do, so long as you're not a total twig. [Snotlout might stop smirking ones he discovers that the sheep of these world are basically balloons compared to the ones he's used to... For now, let him appreciate his muscles.] You just put one across your shoulders and run!

Oh man, you know what'd be awesome, though? Adding the Log Dodge in, too. Don't know why we never did that, back home!

I come from a city so big it's divided into twenty-six sub-cities with over 13,000,000 people in it.

[Completely matter of fact]

I've never seen a sheep in person.

[Wool comes from sheep, right? And...that stuff that waterproofs things. Naaaatuuuuure.]

[WOAH, WAIT, HOLD UP.]

13,000,000? [ w h a t . ] ...That's not a real number.

[IT JUST CAN'T BE, OKAY.]

It is very crowded.

[he shrugs]

And that is why I have never seen a sheep in person. Or most anything out of nature.

[Naaaaaaaatureeeeeee]

That's ridiculous! The cities here are bad enough. Why would you stay in a place like that?

[How did they fit all of you in the great hall...? This is just too much for his poor Viking brain to handle right now.]

Because I like cities. They make sense, there's always light, there's always people.

[There isn't nature. Ask Belphe about Sho's ability to sleep in nature.]

No place needs that many people...

[He shakes the thought out of his head, though he's still looking a bit distracted as he continues.]

Alright, well. I need to look for sheep and some logs, before we can really do anything about that. And a hill... Hmmn.

It's what I was used to.

[He likes it better here, for the most part, but sometimes he misses the cities.]

Tell me when and where to show up. I live for Games.

Oh yeah? Well I live for winning 'em.

[Look at that smug little smirk of his.]

When I've got everything, I'll let you know. Until then, you might want to prepare! Not a lot of people finish the Sheep Lug back home.

[Now watch him...forget about this until the Eevee debacle is over... April is serious business, man.]

How do you suggest I prepare?

[Srsly, he has no idea what he's in for.]

[...Wow, even Hiccup knew how to train.]

How do you think? Start lifting things! Heavy things!

[Man, he'd love to see what this guy thought "heavy" was...]

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Video - Locked FROM Belphe

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